Just Friends

After four days of no communication whatsoever, I reconciled with a friend. It took him only one text to bring me back, he texted me, "Daya mo, lagi na lang ako ang suko". I wasn't really sure where our misunderstanding, if there's any, have stemmed from. It's just that one day he stopped texting, calling and emailing me. As far as I am aware of, I have not done anything to embarras him or make him feel bad about me. The only thing I can remember during the last time that we have spoken, I mentioned to him in all honesty that he should stop seeing and start forgetting those people who only have nothing but pain and disappointment to give him back. For four days, though I don't think it's fair to assume, maybe he has tried.

My friend is gay and he has been very vocal to let me know that he likes me. I have never given it any serious thought though sometimes I want to tell him to stop as it is making me feel so awkward, uneasy and uncomfortable. During that last time that we have talked, maybe I was able to convey that message impliedly and he got the point more or less. If he was embarrased, or hurt or did feel bad, I don't know sure. I have no intention, I just wanted to set things right and straight.

So for four days, no one has bothered me. I have afforded to change my blog's lay-out and I was able to recuperate from days of less sleeps and nocturnal blogging. I was back to my roots and of being domesticated, far from anyone's attention and distraction. I was happy and free while someone else was "getting over someone else". Though I knew something was happening, I gave him all the time to ponder on. I knew in time he'd realized that it's out of my league, that our friendship will endure even without pushing it to some undesirable limits.

Sometimes I blame myself for being so nice and lovable. Girls, guys and gays couldn't help but fall, even friends and that's the worst of all.